Snack Spectrometer #1: Kinder Joy

On my recent foray into Euro-Land I discovered many things, some new and exciting, some I’d rather forget. One item that fell into the “new and exciting” category was a mysterious treat known as the “Kinder Joy” and it inspired me to conceive of the Snack Spectrometer, the newest digest to grace this web-lication.

The Kinder Joy appears at first to be a European version of the beloved Kinder Surprise*. It is almost identical in size, shape and design as those eggs of inevitable disappointment, but, on closer inspection, the shell is an egg-shaped plastic housing with opening tabs at the bottom.

The exterior reads “Avec Surprise” and, on pulling the tabs, this proves to be the case in the extreme. Where one expects a chocolate egg to be, the Joy simply parts in two, one half covered with a silvery Kinder foil and the other having a film with “?” symbols over it. Attached to the Kinder foil is a small Kinder paddle too, very mysterious…

Opening the “?” section reveals the surprise (read; toy). These seem to be universally standard throughout the international Kinder range, so they’re generally alright but nothing special. Unfortunately, I got a horrible Shrek themed pen top replete with stickers of the rather tired CGI ogre.

The snack itself, however, was much more entertaining than the toy.

Opening the Kinder foil reveals more of a surprise that the “?” section. We are presented with what is best described as two mini Ferrero Rocher** in white chocolate mousse, the reason for the Kinder paddle becomes evident. Scooping a mini Rocher ball up with what turns out to be white and milk chocolate layered mousse proves to be a little difficult as the mousse is very stiff, however the reward is most gratifying. I’m not a fan of Rocher and these are identical in every way, but with the Kinder gunk they are much better. The gunk turns out to be very tasty, but like a half digested Kinder Egg. The texture is ok, but it’s a tad sickly and I think any more than this half egg portion and I’d feel a little ill.

In conclusion I’d have to say I prefer the Kinder Surprise we have over here presently, as the chocolate is nicer than the mousse desert and the toys are the same. However, I’d certainly recommend trying one of these treats if you happen upon one, they are a strange but pleasant experience.

+4 in the full Rjandberg-Smythe Scale (+12 to -12)

+Interesting packaging
+You get a toy
+Nice gunk

-A little sickly
-Inferior to the Surprise

* On further investigation I discovered that the Joy is the summer version of Surprise in mainland Europe, as the Surprise’s egg suffers in the warmer temperatures “over there”.

** Ferrero make both Rocher and the Kinder range. So, most likely, they are precisely mini Rocher.

***Currently starring on the When It Rains blog.

Tags: avec surprise, chcoclate, europe, kinder, review, snacks

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World Review

About four years ago at the excellent Page 45 in Nottingham, I picked up an innocuous looking digest format comic book. Its title was Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. Last night I got around to watching the film adaptation of it for the second time so I could write this review properly.

Scott Pilgrim is a slacker. Not the mangy pot-smoking poverty-line kind, but the kind of shiftless, cute, aimless layabout which can only exist in fiction. Scott falls in love with Ramona V. Flowers after meeting her in his head whilst napping. He convinces Ramona to date him, but almost accidentally ends up dating her at the same time as his platonic, 17 year old, rebound girlfriend Knives Chow. Scott soon finds out that seven of Ramona’s evil exes, headed by the villainous Gideon Gordon Graves, have banded together to fight him, all whilst he tries to keep in the good books of Ramona and go to band practice.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is a visually stunning film. It is cut like a music video, shot like a CG blockbuster and looks like a videogame, but don’t confuse it for any of those things. Edgar Wright and co. take the worst parts of the soulless Hollywood summer films and makes them a selling point, turning Scott Pilgrim from what could be another quirky teen comedy into something much braver and impressive. Consider a comic adaptation like Iron Man. In Marvel’s recent films the comic inspires the film, which takes the concepts from the books and transplants them into the real world, or at least the celluloid real world. Scott Pilgrim instead presents itself like the comic played on a cinema screen, placing stylish onomatopoeia in shot and even going as far as using frames lifted straight from the book as flashbacks.

These stylistic touches play into the theme of the film, producing exciting, appealing and, most importantly, funny fight sequences. It’s a rare occasion when a battle plays through without a comedic interlude. In-between these scenes are the story of Scott trying to make it work with Ramona whilst being inept and charming, all the while his equally inept, charming friends muddle along with him.

Now let me explain why I had to see this film twice before I could write the review. After the first watching on release day (damn you Little White Lies preview selector bot!) I came out of the cinema with a big grin and happy thoughts. After I let the film percolate in my head for a while I noticed something that bothered me. I don’t think any of the characters have real depth, even as Scott wins the day and the girl we only see a tiny glimmer of character growth. Most of them seem to be the essence of their comic counterparts, distilled into stereotypes; none worse than Scott’s ex Envy Adams, who hardly gets any screen time at all.

This really bothered me, why had this not mattered during the film but only irked me afterwards? The answer came after my second watching. The characters can only be shown as thin slices of personality. The relentless pace of the film basically dictates this, but stylistically the videogame inspired nature of the narrative also supports wafer thin characterisation. These people aren’t Final Fantasy or Mass Effect cohorts, but are Slippy Frog and Diddy Kong. They serve their plot purpose; make you laugh then get out of the way. I have decided I like that.

It’s worth mentioning here that Kieran Culkin as Wallace Wells steals the show completely, some friends suggesting they’d happily watch a Wallace Wells spin off movie. He has the best lines, great timing and just the right amount of charm mixed with lascivity.

The re-watching didn’t help some things though. I speak, of course, of the mind control chip. Whilst I suppose it sounds like a campy-yet-fun plot device it comes across as a last minute inclusion, fixed by a poor deus ex machina. Sure, the third act needed to be kept snappy, but this seemed like an ill-judged contrivance. Other elements of the plot make little sense also, but these come off as charming idiosyncrasies.

Michael Cera as Scott still seems a bit off to me. Film Scott seems a bit too pathetic. We never see the self-confident, impish grin of the book Scott. Don’t get me wrong, I like Michael Cera, I just think playing Scott a little cheekier and assured would have been a better move and Cera doesn’t seem to be able to quite pull that off.

Even with these flaws though, the film comes together as a great piece of work. It tries to be something different, and genuinely succeeds. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World realises the idea of a graphic novel as a film, even better than Sin City did. It’s fast, clever, exciting and most of all fun. Go into expecting a lot of silliness and leave the po-face at home and you’ll get the most from it. Even better take some chums along and have a good old geek-out afterwards.

+7 on the Rjandberg-Smythe Scale (+12 to -12)
+ Geeky, campy fun
+ Genuinely different and engaging
+ Great soundtrack
- Shallow characters
- Some dodgy plot points

AFTERWORD
Don’t listen to Ado. Scott should not end up with Knives. If he disagrees with me I shall be forced to shoot him down with amazing logic. Also Tom Petty’s American Girl should have been the credit music.